New photos leaked to the public!

Nice Kitty...

Terrorized by a rampaging housecat, Bridget and Tawny cower in fear of getting clawed. This particular cat has a taste for plastic...


Bridget and Tawny, in an effort to defend themselves from further abuse by their owners, were recently inspried by a certain Nancy Sinatra song. These boots were made for walkin', but they ain't gonna walk all over anyone without any legs to start with! Sorry girls, a neck just doesn't cut it.


Tragedy Strikes!

Tawny was rushed to the plastic surgeon last Monday after some jock-type mistook her for a football and kicked her square in the face as hard as he could. Apparently Tawny forgot that falling asleep on open grassy fields is a no-no.

The only positive thing to come from this whole fiasco was that she scored a perfect goal. When asked for a quote, all we could make out was "Mmmph...mmmmpphhh bastardmmmphhh."

An Intimate Moment...

Here's Bridget, once again in Xena mode, admiring herself in front of her mirror. This was a candid moment of self-worship at its finest, and we're glad our cameraman was able to get such a clear shot of such intimacy between a self-absorbed supermodel and her own reflection.

Bridget and Tawny cop an attitude...

Our undercover photographer managed to snap these pictures while posing as a hair replacement specialist.

Tawny, sick of being a head and only a head, recently got fed up and decided to dress like one of the bodied. Constructing a body entirely out of styrofoam, she managed to actually leave the apartment and go for a stroll.

Unfortunately, she didn't see the stairs just outside the door. Screaming wildly, she tumbled down the stairs, separated from the body, and rolled out into the street where she was run over by a truck. "Bodies suck!" she said flatly.
Bridget has gone into "Xena mode" to prepare for the arrival of Smack-Child. "That stupid doll isn't taking me out without a fight!" she yelled at our undercover photographer. "She's goin' down, and to hell with international relations! I'll kick her stuffing all over this place! That is, if I had a foot..."

We're not sure what all this means, but it will be explained in the near future. Probably.